Much like every video game journalist (If I can call myself that), I have resorted to trashy top ten style articles. Throughout my life I have witnessed many terrible things, murder, rape pillaging...all by my own hand. It's a sobering thought to think that video games can provide even I, a man with the loosest of Morales; a sense of uninhibited fear. Often this fear comes from most unexpected of places, the likes of resident evil and silent hill pale in comparison to the disturbing events I have witnessed on screen. While certain family members have suggested I confide such details to a phycho-analyst, I see informing everyone of my pain as mandatory to the healing process, even if the sniper rifle in the corner whispers otherwise. Enjoy!
1# The sun
The source of life...or so you might think. The reason you are told to never look directly at the sun is purely an act of common sense by parents. If Super Mario 3 is anything to go by, the sun is a disturbingly unpleasant individual, the intense heat he is subjected to every day has put him in a perpetually menopausal state. I would be happy to see the world plunged into darkness and devoid of vegetation, until a dust bowl effect plagues the world with unending blight. Just as long as that sun should never emerge again. My only concern is whether or not there is a moon equivalent, it might be considerably smaller, but its a lot closer to earth and constant comparisons to his brighter sibling may have caused him to develop a serious Napoleon complex. Its an extreme measure on the part of the sun, of all the threats to the galaxy, the most noble of causes is thwarting a plumber saving a princess. His methods are incredibly destructive and cack handed at best, by weaving down to earth the sun brings a rein of destruction. Boiling the seas, melting the polar ice caps and providing unhealthy amounts of UV to billions of people. Perhaps its naive of me to think something older than the concept of time would have a more calculating plan of action. Then again, solar entities aren't well known for their mental prowess.
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